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Mathematics Teacher : Your request is reasonable. How much do we owe you, Herr

Wasserkopf?
Wasserkopf : I will tell you exactly. I attended this school for six years in all.

During the first three years the fee was 150 crowns quarterly.
Total for three years 1800. During the second three years the fee
was 400 crowns semi-annually. Total: 2400 and 1800 is 4200.

Examination fee. 240 crowns 95 heller. Certificates, documents,
books, stamp taxes, 1241 crowns 43 heller. Total : 5,682 crowns
38 heller. Incidentals, stationery, notebooks, 768 crowns 12 heller.
Grand total: 6,450 crowns 50 heller.

Mathematics Teacher : [Checks with paper and pencil] Exactly!

Wasserkopf : Exactly!
Mathematics Teacher : I certify that this candidate
passes in mathematics.

His answer to the easy
question was a little out of
the way; but his answer to

the difficult question-how
much the refund should
be - was exactly correct.

Herr Wasserkopf is really a
mathematical genius.

Principal : I present the results of the examination. Herr Wasserkopf has
passed with distinction in every subject, and has again shown that
he is entitled to the certificate we awarded him on his graduation.

And we offer our congratulations - accepting a large share of them
for ourselves for having taught you so excellently. And now that we

have verified your knowledge and your abilities get out before we
have you thrown out!

[The principal turns to the staff and beams.]

Thank you, colleagues for your magnificent co-operation. In the
future, it will be our proudest boast that in this school, a pupil
simply cannot fail!

[They shake hands and slap each other’s back].

– Frigyes Karinthy (abridged)

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